Ramblings and Ruminations, Saturday Night at the Movies

My Definitive Ranking Of Every Disney Prince

I saw my friend Eva’s do a post like this over on her blog, Coffee, Classics, and Craziness, and thought it was so fun, I was inspired to do my own definitive ranking of the Disney Princes and Princesses.

 

But then I decided to add something more.  I wanted to do something special for the month of July, and I decided to pick a theme for the month!

 

For the month of July, everything on Allison’s Well (and my author blog) is going to be about . . . DISNEY.

 

A Disney theme somehow felt appropriate for the hot summer months.

So now, without further ado, the first of four Disney themed blog posts – my definitive ranking of Disney princes!  Going to kind of let my hair down for this one. 🙂

 

Note: I will shoot straight with you and admit that for some of these Prince’s I’ve only seen clips or scenes. But, eh, so what? 

That’s not going to stop me from forming opinions about them BECAUSE I CAN MAKE SNAP JUDGEMENTS WITH THE BEST OF THEM.

 

 

# 11 – Prince Eric

 

 

 

 

 

Plus, he has A LOUSY MOTIVATION.  His goal?  To find his one true love.  That’s it – nothing else, zippo.

Who are you man?  What are your ambitions, your dreams, your duties, your passions?

Get a job, Eric.  Get a hobby.  Get SOME KIND of identity outside of this girl that hasn’t even showed yet.

 

 

Yeah, I know he kills the witch (so that’s more than what the Charming Twins from Cinderella and Snow White accomplish) and he’s kind to Ariel before he realizes that she’s “the one” – but I don’t care: I don’t like him.  He just ACTS SO STUPID.

And he looks stupid.

 

 

 

# 10 – Prince Charming

 

 

I’m going to give Charming one extra point (maybe half a point) because his part was so small he almost doesn’t exist.

IT NEARLY HAPPENED.  Not every fairy tale needs a prince charming, and so this was almost a win for me.  🙂

BUT OTHER THAN THAT, YIKES.  I don’t see anything going for him. We know nothing about him except that he likes to walk in the woods and he’ll kiss any girl standing (or lying) still.

And as far as looks . . . dude, what’s with the lipstick?  Was that from kissing Snow White?  Or was he kissing some girl BEFORE Snow White?  #TwoTimer

 

# 9 – Prince Charming

 

^ that meme says it all ^

 

Somebody needs to work out at the gym a little more, judging from the way he LUMBERED after Cinderella.

It wasn’t the shoe story that was passed down for all time in Cinderella’s kingdom, it was the story about how a girl in high heels and a ball gown could outrun their crown prince.  *tsks*

 

 

But anyway, lack of physical development aside, Charming is pretty much the professional boyfriend character.  He’s the fairy tale equivalent of those Popular Boys At Local High school in teen-dramas who’s “nice enough” to notice the girl who dresses in clothes she got at Goodwill and has super-white teeth . . . but that’s all.

And by the way, I love Goodwill.  I don’t think scoring clothes there is a bad thing at all. 🙂

I do like his voice, though, so he has that going for him.  I like his voice more than Prince Philip’s.  And speaking of which . . .

 

# 8 – Prince Philip

 

Phillip rather reminds of those nameless princes in old fairy tales.  They do good, prince-like deeds, but we can never really CONNECT with them.  He’s a good guy, he’s just . . . flat.

But not his headgear.  That is definitely not flat.  It is quite pointy.

So yeah.  He got a few extra points because the he’s nicer looking than the Charming Duo.  And the outfit’s interesting, but otherwise . . .

 

 

 

# 7 – Li Shang

 

I liked this character before I saw the movie.  Finally a Disney “Prince” who has an identity other than looking for his true love!  Hooray!

But then I saw the movie.

In theory I could have loved Shang.  Unfortunately, the vocal performance was really sissified and his character ended up standing around looking stupid while Mulan stole all the glory.

 

 

There could have been more than enough glory for both Mulan AND Shang, but instead I ended up being annoyed with Mulan and disgusted with Shang.  When a guy is portrayed as clueless and useless, that makes me mad.  But when a MILITARY guy is portrayed as useless, that REALLY incites me.

Yes, he’s present for every battle, he trains the goofballs under him, but other than hitting his marks, there’s nothing special about him in his personality or deeds. What could have been an interesting relationship with him and his father was pretty much left lying on the table.  Other than Mulan (and even that is under developed), he feels isolated from any of the other characters.  This makes him not only  boring, but even more clearly nothing more than a vehicle to make Mulan look good.

WRITING TIP:  Making a male look bad is NEVER going to make your female character look good.  That little trick never works in any capacity.  Remember that, kids.

Anyway, Shang gets an extra point for being in the military, so he’s ahead of the Charmings and Philip only by a technicality.  Over than that – THUMBS DOWN.

 

# 6 – Aladdin

 

 

He’s kind of cute, but he’s really young – a kid, really. I put Aladdin in a slightly different category than the rest of the princes because he strikes me as a boy, not a man.  Does that make sense?  Another words, if I were an animated Disney Princess, I’d think of Aladdin as a kid brother, not romance material.

Anyway, he was kind of cute and he had a nice voice, but I felt that the character of Aladdin was far more developed in the Broadway version (big mistake cutting Proud of Your Boy, Disney) and I guess Adam Jacobs will always be my Aladdin so it’s hard for me to get excited about any other impostor.

 

^ my boy!!!!!!!!!! ^

 

Aladdin lost a few points because (even though I like his voice) I didn’t really connect with this portrayal of Aladdin, or his animation.  Plus, he has terrible taste in princesses.  He could have done better than Jasmine.

 

# 5 – Naveen

 

I cannot NOT smile when I see that face.  I literally laughed and awww every time I see him or think of him.  I MEAN LOOK AT HIM!!!

I adored Prince Naveen’s voice – it made everything he said sweet, charming, and hilarious.  And then we have his personality, which was also sweet, charming, and hilarious. 😀   It’s hard not to love this impossible, ridiculous prince with his awkward sweetness and fuddly manner.  He’s simply adorable.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t connect with Naveen in his human form at all.  I was actually a little upset when Naveen is transformed back into a human!

 

 

So I’m at a bit of a Catch-22 with Naveen.  I think he’s a keeper as a frog.  But . . . as a human?  Um . . .

I don’t know how to resolve my self to any of this!!!

 

 

 

# 4 – Kristoff

 

 

GAAAH, I love Kristoff so much!  He’s the only 9:00 – 5:00 “Prince” in Disney.  He’s just a regular, blue-collar Joe.

 

 

I liked that there was no SHAME in that.  In most stories (not just Disney) it’s common for the ordinary guy with the “humble” job to be elevated at the end into some entirely different position that doesn’t suit them at all (Han Solo *cough*).  I’m glad that Kristoff was not embarrassed by his ordinariness or his job and stayed Kristoff at the end.

I like that he’s a bit uncultured and a tad rough around the edges.  He’s more REAL, as opposed to the “perfect” guy that is usually presented in Disney movies.

He is also not defined by his lady-love, nor has he any interest in finding romance!  He has a job he’s proud of, something he’s passionate about, a good friend (Sven) and he’s CONTENT WITH THAT.

And guys, he’s so sweet and noble!!!  He pretty much sacrifices EVERYTHING for “someone he just met” – before he even likes her.  He doesn’t love her yet, but after losing his sled (basically his livelihood) and everything on it, he STILL decides to help her.  Yes, admittedly, part of his motivation is the fact that he’s stringing along with her in the hopes he’ll get a new sled, but I personally believe that was just Kristoff being a tough guy.  He was going to help her with or without a reward, because he is a good fellow.

Kristoff lost a few points because, sadly, he is sometimes used as a vehicle for the feminist thread in Frozen.  He stands there looking stupid during the WORST SCENE IN ALL OF FROZEN . . . where Anna punches Han.

*sighs*  Come on, people. Didn’t we have enough fem-power to suit you already?  Must you hog EVERYTHING?  THAT WAS KRISTOFF’S JOB TO DEFEND HER HONOR.  He already didn’t save Anna with a kiss of true love.  Okay, fine, that was fitting with the story, but he NEEDED to be Anna’s hero at least a LITTLE bit at the end.

That scene makes me so mad, I want to punch the filmmakers, well, like this –

 

 

So, yes, unfortunately, Kristoff loses a few points because the filmmakers had a tendency to hold him back and use him as the fall guy for the feminist agenda.  Kristoff had all the potential to be my top favorite.  All blame rests solely on the filmmakers.  I don’t blame poor Kristoff.

 

 

# 3 – John Smith

 

If you say John doesn’t count as Disney Prince, I’ll belt you.  Ahem, just so we’re clear.

 

 

wrong movies? yes. do I care? no.

 

I kind of consider John Smith (and his love interest Pocahontas) to be in their own category. They are most definitely adults, whereas all other Disney heroes and heroines are most definitely young adults or even kids.  There’s a depth and a maturity to their personalities, their behavior, and their romance that is missing from any other Disney couple.  So, while they are counted as an Disney “Prince” and “Princess” – I shall always seem them and their romance in a completely different arena from the standard Disney fare.  I REALLY, REALLY LIKE THEM – but they’re so different, that when I stack them up against the other Disney Princes, it’s difficult for him to compete in a “genre” that is so unlike him.

AM I MAKING ANY SENSE?

WHATEVER. JUST KEEP READING.

Anyway, I REALLY LOVE John.  He has a burning curiosity and a need to explore the situations and people.  It doesn’t take much for Pocahontas to introduce him to a new way of thinking, since he’s quick to change his perceptions and embrace new ideas without in any way compromising on his moral character, which never wavers.  *arm pump*  He’s charming, down-to-earth, and heroic.  He’s noblehearted and willing to sacrifice himself for other people.  He’s adventurous to the core and HAS to wrestle things to the ground and tackle new challenges.  He’s a natural leader and a classically strong ALL MALE MAN.  I love it!  He’s also low-key, adorably flirtatious. Ahem.

 

^ ISN’T HE CUTEST THING? ^ 

 

Plus, he’s voiced by Mel Gibson (I can actually see a lot of his personality and demeanor in John Smith too) so what’s not to love?  Okay, maybe his animation. Because we’re coming down so close to the wire, I had to shave off a few points on that front, because the animation isn’t my absolute favorite.  It’s still good – and I can see a lot of Mel Gibson’s expressiveness there, but the sharpness of the animation, to my mind, didn’t suit John as much as it suited Pocahontas.  That, and he can be seen as a bit of a vehicle as he could be lumped into the Evil White Male Who Must Be Enlightened group, so he lost a few points there, as well.  But not much!  *beams at character with affection*

 

# 2 – Flynn Ryder

 

 

Aside from being one of the most genuinely funny and charming characters to have been launched out of Disney, Flynn also possesses a wonderful character arc from selfish thief to selfless hero.  And unlike some of the other lackluster princes, his vocal performance is out of the ball park.

He’s charismatic, he’s charming (actually, he thinks he’s more charming than he really is, which adds to his humor).  He’s a rogue with a good heart that he hides under a not-very-thick veneer of sarcastic quips.  And DID I MENTION HE’S HILARIOUS?

 

 

He can also be totally ridiculous and do the most absurd and undignified things without losing any of his coolness or panache.

 

 

And he’s so BRAVE!  Seeing his transformation from an out-for-himself thief to the self-sacrificing hero is beautiful.  I loved how when he is captured and is facing death, all he can think about is saving Rapunzel. And when he rides to the rescue, he is willing to die for her and preforms the ultimate sacrifice in a scene that never fails to move me.

It can be really hard to nail the “prince-consort” character without making the guy look like a useless appendage to the female counterpart.  The male who’s sole purpose is to revolve around the female telling her and everyone else how wonderful she is.  *insert gag*

But not so with Flynn Rider.  He’s his own fully realized character OUTSIDE OF RAPUNZEL and he’s his own man.  His self-image is intact enough to be the Crown-Consort, and this position gives him a little more freedom as far as behavior and duties, which would suit Flynn.  He’s not responsible enough to be the heir, but he’s perfect as the heir’s right-hand man.  One rather has the idea from his stories about life in an orphanage (and the way he watches over Rapunzel) that Flynn WANTS to have people to care for and will be very good at it.  He’s the diamond in the rough character who finally receives the nudge he needed to put his courage and kindness to proper use.

Points lost?  Um, NOT MUCH.  Again, he SOMETIMES stands there looking weak and male while Rapunzel steals all the thunder, but, fortunately, not too often.  Other than that, I adore his character, love his voice, and I have no complaints about his animation.

Flynn didn’t lose the top position through any fault of his own.  This leaves only NOSTALGIA and that CERTAIN SOMETHING to take home the medal for Favorite Disney Prince.

 

 

 

ARE YOU READY, GUYS?  HERE WE GO.  MY TOP FAVORITE DISNEY PRINCE OF ALL TIME.

 

 

 

You probably won’t be surprised to find out that it’s . . .

 

 

 

 

 

 

PRINCE HANS!

 

^ funniest / best  pick-up line ever ^

 

 

HAHAHA.  Just kidding.  Though, I do like Prince Hans.

 

 

No, the actual winner of the Best Disney Prince is –

 

 

 

GASTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

STILL KIDDING.  Though I DO love Gaston. 😁

 

Okay, no joke this time. Third time’s the charm.

 

The winner is –

 

# 1 – The Beast

 

 

What can I say about him?  What can I possibly add?

The Beast is US.  You and me.  The Beast represents every lost soul. We are often our own worst enemies.  Our beastly tendencies and the curses we bring upon ourselves nearly consume us.  We rage and mourn and struggle, fighting for our humanity.  And it is only the response of True Love that saves us.  It is then that The Beast – and we – are saved, it is then that we are transformed, it is then that we are made beautiful.

For pure nostalgia, for pure affection, for pure ANIMATED GENIUS, I must choose the Beast as my favorite Disney Prince.  He’s an incredible character, powerfully animated by my favorite Disney animator (Glen Keane) and brilliantly voiced by Robbie Benson, who truly added in all the false hardness and the tentative vulnerability that were vital to this gruff part.

OHHHH, MY BEAST.  He’s horrible and he’s wonderful.  He’s harsh and he’s playful.  He’s full of bitterness and he’s full of childlike wonder.

He’s temperamental, he’s cranky, he’s insecure. He’s also trustworthy, kind, and noble.

He’s afraid, he’s angry, and acts like a little boy.  He’s also brave, gentle, and a mature sacrificial man.

He’s oblivious, but also sensitive. He’s an awkward slob, and he’s also a true Prince. He’s a lost soul, but he’s becoming a hero, there is good inside of him still, trying to claw its way out, crying out to be seen.  And someone sees it!

*pauses a moment, overwhelmed by emotion*

 

^ NOW WE’RE TALKIN’ ROMANCE, PEOPLE. ^

 

Gradually, the Beast begins to transform into his better self, and finally he’s free.  He becomes the hero because he extends mercy to someone who doesn’t deserve it.  And then he dies finally knowing the Truth, no longer railing against it.  And because of this he lives again through glorious redemption.

 

Excuse me, I have to go sob for a few minutes, I’ll be back.

 

 

*returns a few minutes later, blowing nose*

 

On a less serious note:  I really only liked The Beast as a beast, I had trouble resolving myself to his human form (the same conundrum I faced with Naveen).  *sighs*  I felt a bit of a disconnect after he was transformed.

Funny story, in the audio commentary for Beauty and the Beast, the creators admitted that they were worried about this and a lot of people “wanted their bison back!”

Also, who else thinks Richard Armitage should have been cast as the Beast in a live action version?  Thorin basically IS the Beast and he would have been PERFECT in the part.  *fumes because it didn’t happen*

 

And there you have it!  My definitive ranking of the Disney Princes.

 

 

Now, what is YOUR definitive ranking of the Disney princes?  OBVIOUSLY, I HAVE TO KNOW.

 

 

Next week, we’ll have my definitive ranking of every Disney Princess and there will be two more Disney-themed posts after that, SO STAY TUNED.

TOODLE-OO, CHAPPIES.

 

 

Tagged , ,

16 thoughts on “My Definitive Ranking Of Every Disney Prince

  1. OH MY. I love this so much. This has to be like, the best post ever.
    These points were SO GOOD!!! Really true thoughts I had never considered before! And also this was amazing because DISNEY. (Also I can literally not wait for the Disney Princess Ranking post – I need this now please)
    And I’d have to say my fave Disney Prince is Kristoff! He is #incredible
    (Also I have followed your blog for so long but have never commented!!! *sobs* *scolds self* I dearly love your blog! Nice to finally meet you! ❤️)

    1. HEY PENNY! Thank you so much for commenting!! Pfft, don’t scold yourself; I am terrible about commenting on the blogs I follow!

      Haha, I’m so glad you enjoyed the post! And thank you for following!!!! 😍 You’re so sweet!

      That makes me very happy! *fangirls with you over Kristoff* He’s such a great character! 👍

  2. THIS POST IS EVERYTHING I DIDN’T KNOW I NEEDED. This was GREAT! And I am sooooo excited about you doing Disney posts all month. YES PLEASE! Disney = LIFE! This is gonna be the best!!!

    Okay, but THIS POST. I was nodding along (and laughing) to sooo much you said. Some of those earlier Disney Princes were definitely…erm…lackluster. And kind of creepy. Like Phillip and Charming? Suddenly falling in love with a girl they met ONCE. Stalkerish much dude? Disney definitely got waaay better at actually giving their princes personalities as time went on.

    I have to say though, I ADORE Aladdin. Though that may have something to do with watching it like 239843 times when I was little. I DO agree that he’s more like a kid though. He was never one I have a “crush” on. I just liked his adorkable ways. He’s a little cinnamon roll. <3

    Kristoff is PRECIOUS. I agree with basically everything you said! He was just…Kristoff. Kind and caring and flawed and totally comfortable in his own skin. He was such a refreshing love interest.

    BUT FLYNN AND THE BEAST MY BOIS. <3333 1000000% my favorites of EVER. Everything you said about the Beast just YES. That's why the story of B&B has always meant so much to me. It's such a beautiful picture of us and God's redeeming love. GAH. I just love it so much! And it was so nice to have a Disney princess film with an ACTUAL romance, instead of a "we-met-once-and-are-now-obsessed-with-each-other" sort of thing. Because…yeah. That was weird and needed to stop.

    And Flynn. Good gracious, I love him so much it HURTS. I had read that they chose to not name the movie Rapunzel because it wasn't JUST about Rapunzel. The creators said they wanted to make Flynn just as much of a main character as Rapunzel. And I LOVED that. It was great having a movie that focuses on the princess AND the prince. UGH. I JUST LOVE IT.

    Okay, I need to stop or I'll sit here and blabber about my Disney feels foreverrrr. Needless to say I adored this post and can't waaaait for the next one! (Also, Gaston is totally fabulous and that bit made me laugh SO hard!)

    1. HAHA – THANK YOU, CHRISTINE!!! You’re so sweet! Hopefully you won’t be disappointed! *rubs hands together*

      UM, YES. Creepy and completely lacking in personality. I suppose Disney was just taking it’s cue from the original fairy tales where the heroes were often bland and possibly suspicious if examined too closely…. 😛

      *whispers* I’ve never actually seen the animated Aladdin all the way through, just scenes. *hides* But I understand COMPLETELY but nostalgia. *nods* Aladdin DID seem sweet and cute, but I guess I’m so enamored with the Broadway version (and star) that it’s hard for me to accept any other version!

      I AGREE COMPLETELY ABOUT KRISTOFF. He’s such a unique and well-developed Disney hero!! *squeezes character*

      *MIGHTY GRIN* I was waiting for the fangirling here! FLYNN AND THE BEAST. I adore the Beast so much! Everything you said, I agree completely. The story of Beauty and the Beast never fails to move me to the core and it has meant so much to me for so long! And it IS a genuinely romantic film. 😍 LOL – yes, the Creepy Almost Nonexistent Prince angle definitely needed to stop. 😛

      AND FLYNN!! <3 Yes, it's true! Rapunzel as a title would have never worked! Flynn is her equal as a character! He even narrates the film, for Pete's sake! He is truly a pinnacle of character development for Disney - what's not to love??

      HEHE - Well, I don't mind! I could blabber along with you! There is so much good (and, admittedly, bad) storytelling for us to sink our teeth into when it comes to Disney!!

      AWWCK - thank you! *tackle hugs* You're the best! I can't wait to release the next post!

      BAHAHAHA! YES!! I actually REALLY DO LOVE GASTON. *grins unrepentantly* I mean, come on, gals. HE'S A PRETTY COOL GUY, AMIRIGHT?
      .
      .
      .
      GIF

  3. Looooove this post. And I’m so excited for the other Disney-themed posts!

    Flynn is AWESOME. So is the Beast. I love, love, love both of them.

    And that Jurassic Park GIF is PERFECTION. Made me literally laugh out loud. 😀

    1. Thanks, Eva!! *beams* And thank YOU for the inspiration! I loved your posts so much!

      I KNOW – THEY’RE BOTH SUCH GREAT CHARACTERS.

      HAHAHAHA! I really had fun picking out the gifs in this post. 😀 And EEP, you recognized Jurassic Park!
      .
      .
      .
      GIF

  4. Flynn is definitely my favorite. I like how you pointed out Aladdin was a kid and John Smith and Pocahontas were adults. I grew up on Pocahantas but hadn’t watched it in over a decade when I rewatched in the last few years. I was surprised at how balanced it was, can’t imagine how horrible it would be if done now.

    I think Kristoff is less respectable than the cardboard princes of the earlier movies (I do find Philip hilarious after reading a joke post of Disney Prince’s College Dating Profile, his was campus creeper), because I don’t see any use for him except as the feminist punching bag (he basically follows Ana around the whole movie and does what she tells him).

    I couldn’t stand Mulan the first time because it was so feminist. This last time, I just enjoyed all the humor.

    1. Hey Livia!! High five to Flynn! It’s very rare for me to see someone who DOESN’T like him.

      Yes, yes – we agree exactly over Aladdin, John Smith, and Pocahontas! *nods vigorously* I actually watched Pocahontas for the first time last year and I personally found it pretty lopsided (most of the settlers were unbelievably stupid and evil) but I was amazed at how beautifully the romance was handled – and, of course, the animation was wonderful!

      HA – I need to find that joke about Philip!! YEAAAH – I have to agree with you about Kristoff, to a certain point. *sad sigh* He had so much POTENTIAL, but that was why he lost points for me, because he was basically Anna’s yes-man – and that was annoying.

      The best part about Mulan was Mushu and the Cricket! *laughs* And some of the animation. The rest of it was kind of throw-away, in my opinion which is a shame, because I could have adored the story!

  5. Great post, Alli!!! <3

    Quasimodo is always my favorite. I really love Kristoff, too, though. I like that he's so calm and level-headed. And you're right, he's never ashamed of his job, and that's so cool!! He takes actual PRIDE in it.

    I like the scene where Anna punches Hans because she's the one he hurt the most, so if she WANTS to punch him, I say, go ahead 😉 But we can agree to disagree about that 😉

    1. Thanks, Katie!!! 😀

      Yessss, I knew Quasimodo was your dear favorite!! 😍 Yes, I love that about Kristoff! He is so down to earth and satisfied!

      Haha, well, I thought that scene was really more of a storytelling goof. Kristoff’s foreshadowing to be Anna’s hero was never completed. Haha, yes we can! 👍

  6. I pretty much agree with the order of this list, except for me, I don’t know that I can choose between Flynn Rider and Beast. They’re so different, but both wonderful, so I’ll call it a tie. 😉

  7. I have pretty much the same opinion as E.F.B., but couldn’t Prince Caspian from Narnia be counted?! Honestly. He’s so CUTE. 😂

    1. Hey Abbie!! Thanks for commenting! So cool that we share the same personal ranking! 🙂

      HAHA – well, I think that would be for a more Narnia themed post. Although, now that I think on it, the Narnia movies WERE produced by Disney, so . . . 🤔
      .
      .
      .
      GIF

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *